Call your brokers, everyone! Grizz Chapman from 30 Rock rang the New York Stock Exchange opening bell this morning along with members of the National Kidney Foundation. This is a sign. Based on my advanced market analysis, when someone this cool rings the opening bell, the Dow Jones should close just north of the 82,000,000,000 [...]
Call your brokers, everyone! Grizz Chapman from 30 Rock rang the New York Stock Exchange opening bell this morning along with members of the National Kidney Foundation. This is a sign. Based on my advanced market analysis, when someone this cool rings the opening bell, the Dow Jones should close just north of the 82,000,000,000 mark. Being that it opened at 10,396, that’s a pretty significant gain. Trust my investing advice here, people*.
*Do not, under any circumstances, trust my investing advice. Don’t even trust my advice about buying vests.
After the jump, see Grizz dumping his shares of Shinehardt Universal. I would invest with Grizz over the Etrade baby any day. [photos via Getty Images]
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